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First Kiss Boredom finally drove me from my room. I hated leaving my little sanctuary, my island away from young brothers and fighting parents. But the book was finished, and there was nothing left to clean. I visited the supposed "family room" first. An addition to the original house, it had been meant as a place for us to play games and to be together. Dad had filled half of it with his Amateur Radio equipment as soon as the plaster had dried, changing the name of the room to "Ham shack". It was his escape from the realities of job, children, and a wife he had nothing in common with. From him I’d learned the art of running away from the bad things in my life.Multiple short-wave radios beeped out messages in Morse code until the sound was more white noise than single note. Todd, my dad’s best friend, sat in front of the jumble, turning black dials and listening. To him the whirs and pulses had depth and meaning, each a single voice reaching out to him from around the globe. "Hey, Todd," I said, glad I had left my room.Seeing Todd was always a treat. Younger than my dad, he related as well to my mom’s wild spirit as he did dad’s bookish personality. He played rough games with the boys and danced to the popular songs with me. He was everyone’s friend. He traveled with us to the various Ham fests, gatherings of Amateur Radio operators from the tri-state area. The long drives were always happier when Todd came along. My brothers fought less, my parents fought less, and I had someone I could talk to.Swiveling in his chair, he smiled and beckoned me closer. "How’s my girl?" One of his games was that I was his girlfriend. I longed for it to be real, dreamed that it was even a possibility. "Just finished another book," I followed the lure of his brown eyes, suffered myself to be lifted into his lap like a child. "What’s going on out there?" I pointed to the radio."Nothing much," I felt the rise of his chest as he breathed in the clean scent of me. I snuggled down against his shoulder. It was safe and quiet there, as if nothing in this world, or this house, could harm me as long as I stayed in his arms. We sat for a while, listening to the Morse code messages. Todd moved the heavy black dial fraction by fraction, seeking the messages from farthest away. Closing my eyes, I imagined I could fathom the beeps, putting words to the sounds and creating stories in my mind."What book did you finish?" He asked at last, his voice rich and warm on my ear. Trust him to want to know, I thought. My family didn’t care what I read or what I wrote, much less how I felt, or what I thought. Nobody understood me as Todd did."’Death on the Nile’, by Agatha Christie." "That’s a good one. Lots of interesting twists."I nodded in agreement. Murder and romance in the exotic desert of Africa, I thought. Far away from the reality of a thin girl who read too much, and who was too shy to make real friends. Instead I had friends of the imagination. Mysterious strangers from the pages of my hidden Romance novels, children my age with lives of adventure on distant planets, talking animals who cavorted with creatures of myth and legend. And always there was Todd, rescuing me from the horror of my family, understanding that inside I was full-grown.He inhaled again, his arms tightening around me. A small, loving kiss grazed my cheek. Comforting me, even though I hadn’t spoken a word. Moving a little, I studied his face from the side. Straight dark hair grazed the collar of his white tee shirt. Looking smooth and soft, his youthful face was lightly freckled from the summer’s sun. Brown eyes under straight brows studied me in return, hypnotizing.His eyes deepened to black, and he lowered his lips to mine. Normal, I thought. An everyday occurrence between the two of us, a gesture of the friendship we share. Something was different this time. He closed his eyes, turning his head slightly. I followed along, closing my eyes and blotting out everything but him, I let him lead me where he wanted to go. Strong hands cupped the side of my face and the back of my head. Long fingers slid behind my ear.Gentle softness as his tongue caressed my lips, which parted instantly, as if knowing what was required of them. Explosions of emotions, love and longing and sudden desire rocked my body as our tongues joined. My hands slid up his chest and around his neck, tangling into his soft hair. All the things I had ever read in those hidden romance books suddenly had meaning and depth. Liquid fire, the feeling in my heart. A melding of souls, as he joined his essence with mine."Laura!" My dad called from the living room. Spell broken, we parted. Had it been an instant, or forever?Flushing, he set me on the floor and stood. He ran shaking fingers through his disheveled hair. Dark eyes filled with regret and shame never left mine. I stared back, amazed and unable to move. Shivers of reaction, coursed through me, sending pinpricks of light along my limbs. Clutching the edge of the desk for support, I wondered why I didn’t crash to the floor at his feet."Laura!" Smiling, he took hold of my hand. Both of us still shook, and he squeezed my fingers, reassuring me. He flipped his head toward my dad’s voice, and let me go, sending me back into reality alone.He never mentioned it again, and neither did I. It’s nothing more than a dream now, colored in the golden glow of my childhood. One I hope never fades.
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